My Weblog

Do You Love This Country?

_{Some Americans have a distorted view as to what it means to be a citizen of this great country, apparently not fully understanding the meaning of Patriotism.}

_{Some think that merely putting a flag in front of their home, or placing a bumper sticker on their car -or even wearing red, white, and blue- will make them patriotic.}

 _{That’s far from the truth.  Webster’s Dictionary defines the real meaning of Patriotism as love for or devotion to one's country.} 

_{Love is an action word.  I love my wife.  I don’t demonstrate that by wearing a t-shirt with her picture on it, nor do I put a bumper sticker that says “I love my wife.”  That would be nice, but it will not do much for our marriage.}

_{To love my wife is to show her I love her -to be faithful to her, to actually go out of my way to demonstrate my love.  To bring her flowers, to desire to spend time with her, to treat her with the respect she deserves. To love my country means to be active in doing things that make it better, or at least to maintain the level it is in.}

_{To produce movies that show the world that Americans are divided is not patriotism. To make movies that encourage our future generation to live an immoral life is not patriotism. To change issues we've already voted on for the benefit of very few is not good for this country which prides itself in the right to vote. To look for ‘what can the country do for me,’ to cheat on my taxes, to leave my wife for a younger woman and not pay child support, really cannot be covered-over with a bumper sticker or a flag.  You get the point.}

_{What is Patriotism?} 

 _{I believe that the true meaning of patriotism is to be actively involved in doing what is good for this country. To serve others –to take one day a year to help a fatherless child; to help a Single mother with the things she cannot do by herself; to pay your taxes; to find ways where you can be an asset to this country, not a liability; to work on your marriage; to improve your relationship with your children. That is Patriotism. I'm asking you, my fans and the ones reading this blog, to list one good thing you did for this Country in the last 12 months. I hope that it will encourage others to rethink their patriotism and hopefully be more thankful for all the blessings our country offers. I'm just tired of people complaining about this country and doing selfish things, that can be harmful to the rest, and still wave a flag on the 4th of July.}

 

10 things I'm thankful for today (Hilary, Obama, and McCain)

1. I’m thankful for the IRS for keeping my money with them and away from robbers and identity thieves.

2. I’m thankful for some of our attorneys for keeping people from taking responsibility for their actions.

3. I’m thankful for the guests on the Jerry Springer show. They make me look normal.

4. I’m thankful for telemarketers who keep me from finishing my dinner and therefore stay healthy.

5. I’m thankful for people with perverted life styles for reminding me that I live in a fallen world.

6. I’m thankful for the Airport Security Personal who always force me to run to the terminal to catch my plane.  I need the exercise. 

7. I’m thankful for all the slow drivers on the road that save me from crashing at high speeds.

8. I’m Thankful for Krispy Kream for keeping from being proud of my looks.

9. I’m thankful for Paris Hilton for making me feel smart every time I watch her.

10. I’m thankful for McCain, Hillary, and Obama for making me think that I can even run for president.

The Day It Happened

I still remember Tuesday, September 11, I still remember the day my flight almost caught on fire, on the other hand I remember the day I first saw Maha my Wife.  I remember a lot of other life changing events that happened to me.

I’m sure you do too.  You remember them vividly.  It’s the day you met your spouse, the day you had the accident, the day a loved one died. The day your child was born. The day you broke up with someone you love.

But do you remember that morning right before that special event happened.  What was it like?  You got up in the morning, and you didn’t expect it to be different. 

Some of you reading this are facing challenges and problems and I want you to know that things can change in less than 24 hours. Isn’t that encouraging?

I got up this morning, started my devotions, and quiet time, with no plans for anything to be different.  I hope it won’t but if it does am I ready to face it.  We’ll I think I’m more ready to face the day when I start right with God, that I could be if I didn’t.

Baby Tali Joy

She's here.  Baby Tali Joy was born today November 6th at 12:17 PM. She's 6 Lbs. 4 oz and only 17 inches long.  Why have a 10 Lbs. baby when you can have a Hybrid?  Economy baby with the same powerful vocal cords that can keep you up at night.  This is our 3rd C-section.  I was hoping for a Balcony but hey....I didn't buy my tickets early enough.

Maha is doing great.  She said that this one was her easiest c-section. Once she recovered from the anethtesia I looked her in the eys and with all the passion a husband can offer, I said: "Now that you had the baby, you have no excuse for not cleaning the garage and washing hte car.  It has been 9 months, baby!"

John and Carole are so excited about their baby sister.  I promsied them a Wii when the baby is born.  They thought I was getting them the game Wii, but what I meant is that during the night all they're going to hear is the baby going: "Wii Wii Wii."

So, thank you for all your prayers and I'm so glad the baby was so ocnsiderate of my calendar and decided for me to be in town.

Hawaii

I’m here in Kona, Hawaii. What a beautiful part of the world. People are very nice. They better be. How can you not be nice living in a beautiful place like that?

The reason I came to Hawaii is to help people here use more consonants. They are abusing the vowels. I want to remind them that there are 21 consonants in the Alphabet. They’re only using four or five only. Use the R, the Z, and the T. Cut down on the K, the W, and the H. Some of the vowels are meant to be silent.

Actually I’m here to help a Life Pregnancy center In Kona raise money. I did a comedy show for them last night and had the pleasure to meet Hawaii’s Lieutenant Governor, James,Duke, Aiona. He’s a believer in Jesus Christ and a wonderful guy. I’m off today. Tomorrow I head out to Oahu to teach the Sunday Morning service at a Calvary Chapel church (Love, Inc.) and then a concert in the evening for Calvary Chapel Honolulu. TBN broadcasting is going to tape the event and air it in Hawaii. Pray that it will touch people’s hearts and lives.

I feel bad being here with all the clean air, while my family is in California breathing the smoked filled air. It was horrible when I left California yesterday morning. You cannot roll down your car window or be outdoors. Why do people still use the roll down your car window term? Are there any people that still have cars with roll down windows? If they do, they need to roll down their windows and throw their pagers and their cassette tapes out of the window.

Pray for the people in California, especially the kids with Asthma; people with respiratory problems; people that had to evacuate, and for the ones that lost their homes. I don’t feel funny today breathing clean air while my wife and two kids are breathing smoke. Maha, my wife, is nine months pregnant and I don’t think it’s good for her, or any pregnant woman, to breathe that air. I asked her to stay indoors, but with me gone, it’s hard for her not to go out and buy groceries and other stuff for the house. Please pray that God will focus my ministry in California so I can stay close. Mahalo friends.

Finally friends remember the words of Paul in Philippians 4:8 : "Whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things."

“Busy Airports Miss Fake Bombs in Test”

All the Terrorists need to do is watch our Television programs and read our papers to find out the best Target to hit.  After September 11, 60 minutes had an entire series on our most vulnerable landmarks and sensitive areas. 

I can see an Alquida operative in this Country having a field day sending secrets just by submitting press releases. During World War 1&2 they had spies, secret ink, and Morris Code. Now they have CNN.  I can picture CNN saying the following: "Just send the message through us.  In fact Our Journalists and Newscasters will do the work for you Alquida.  You just hide in the caves and we will do the research for you. Also, tell you leader to stop using the primitive method of communication by sending VHS video tapes to Al-Jazeera TV.  We can produce these videos and send them through the Turner Broadcasting Network."

Today USA Today has this article: “Busy Airports Miss Fake Bombs in Test” and then the article went on to list the airports that had bad security.  I can see Al Zaharawi, 2^nd man in Alquida, saying the following: “On Behalf of Alquida, I want to thank you American Media for making our life easier.  Now if the Travel Channel can only tell us the easiest place to cross the Canadian Border, and the A&E do a program on the best chemicals to mix to make bombs then we’ll be greatly appreciative.” 

School Fundraising Catalogs

The school gave my kids catalogs of Helen Grace Chocolate and gift wrapping for a School Fundraiser. The school gives them a catalog full of chocolate and candy and asks them to go sell it to strangers?   Thank you school. I spent days warning my children about not accepting candy from strangers,

We went to the neighbors to sell them. Only to find out that now my kids are considered solicitors. 

This is what we heard in less than one block of houses:

Our carpet is clean and we don’t have termites. 

You’re a cult and we don’t want to talk to you.

I don’t want your watch tower magazine. 

"My son replied it’s not a watch tower it’s Helen Grace." They answered back.  We don’t want to know about her teachings.

Another neighbor picked two kinds of Chocolate.  My 6 year old, God bless the honesty of the kids, said to him. “Are you sure you need more chocolate?  I said honey you’re a sales person now, you cannot tell the truth.  Just give enough facts and wait.

One neighbor bought some.  But as he was writing the check, his wife stormed downstairs and grabbed the check book from him and said:  “We don’t have any money to spend.  You’re always spending money we don’t have.  What’s wrong with you?” and then she smiled at my daughter and said: No sweetheart.  My husbands have a spending problem.  We don’t want any chocolate today, and shuts the door.  My 9 year old said You don’t need chocolate, you need a different wife. I said: I’ll drop by the E-Harmony catalog tomorrow.

Then another neighbor bought stuff and wanted a proof that we will deliver.  I told him that we are his neighbors and we will deliver it.  He said what if you move before then?

Oh I can picture the conversation with my wife at night: honey let’s sell the house, find a new one, Hire a moving company, so we can con our neighbor of the $7 Chocolate bar.”

People are getting suspicious lately.  Kids today are not as innocent as we used to be.  I promised my daughter something and did the Pinky promise thing, but I guess that’s not enough anymore. She needs another finger promise.

What’s the aspiration for my kids?  If they sell $50,000 worth of chocolate they get a rubber chicken.  Now I have a neighborhood going into a diabetic coma, and having marriage conflicts so my kids can play with a rubber chicken. 

A month later a neighbor is asking: “How’s your kids doing on that fundraiser? Did they get their rubber chicken yet, I got my insulin pump and I’m moving because the wife is keeping the house.”

Honor Killing

I’m so mad and angry to hear of what happened to the Kurdish girl few days ago.  up to 1000 men from the Yezidi Kurdish community of Mosul stoned to death a teenager who's only crime was running away to marry a Muslim man whom she loved and converting to his religion.

For four months the girl had been given shelter by a local Muslim Sheik. It was reported that in the last few days her family persuaded her to return home, convincing her that she had been forgiven by her parents and relatives for her mistake.

I’m ashamed to say that many countries in the Middle East still practice the Honor Killing; Killing their own daughters in the name of honor.  What honor?  Ignorance is what’s taking away your honor you idiots.  The whole world now knows what kind of criminals you are.  So much for your honor.

What kind of ignorant, monsters can do such a thing?  Those idiots have cell phones, and they know how to use the camera phone; how to upload it to the Internet.  I’m assuming they also know how to write and sign a wireless company’s contract.

How can her family allow this? How can a father let such a thing happen to his own daughter? What a difference between the educated people in the West, and some of the ignorant people of the East.  In America we don’t stone our daughters for doing shameful things; we invite them on the Jerry Springer show.

Creation Fest

Just got back from performing at Creation Fest in Washington State.  It was a wonderful Festival.  I got the opportunity to perform for 20,000 people and later that night, I had over 1200 people at the comedy tent.  Harry Thomas is the creator of Creation Fest. That doesn’t sound right.  He’s the man is a better term.  A great man of God that looks like Santa Claus. My friend Shawn was at Creation Fest last year.  It was 115 F.  So hot they changed the name to Cremation Fest. This year it was nice, it was 80 F out there.  I had the chance to hang out with the members of Jars of Clay.  They went on stage with tight shorts and 70’s sunglasses. I announced that Jars of Clay have cracked at Creation Fest.

I had a nice normal conversation with Charlie, the keyboard guy from Jars of Clay. He’s a father of a twin 7 year old boys.  We talked about family, the road, and being in the business.  It’s wonderful when people do that in the Green Room.

Hanging behind main stage at these festivals can be taunting.  There are the volunteer security guards and volunteer people who their main job is to keep you away from main stage unless you have the All Access Pass.  We’ll I forgot my All Access Pass in the car and now I had to convince a volunteer that I’m an Artist and I need to get on stage in few minutes.  The guy didn’t buy that. What do you tell him? How can I prove that I’m an Artist?  Finally someone recognized who I were and allowed me to get to the stage.  But it’s a big ego trip for many people. It’s the hang out of the Elite.  For the sake of the artists, let’s keep the fans away from back stage mentality.

Flying back, we had a procrastinator pilot, He kept bringing our attention to landmarks but few minutes after we already passed it.  My nick still hurts.

Oshkosh - WI

Lifest was wonderful.  I did two shows and had over 1500 people in each shows. It was a great opportunity to meet so many of my fans from Wisconsin.  I love Wisconsin. The Festival was right next to the Airplane Museum in Oshkosh. They had flight simulation rides and I thought to myself.  I should go there because I enjoy flying and airplanes, but then again: Do I need suspicious looks from employees and visitors alike? "What is he doing here?" they will say. "What is he trying to learn?".

I think for me to go to a Plane Museum is like Lindsay Lohan going to a bar tending school.